The feeling that we are not living our own life, or as if we are watching a movie with our participation, can arise for various reasons. But the more often an inner voice wakes up, whispering “something is wrong with your life,” the more terrible it is to change something.
What keeps us from stepping out of our comfort zone? Why are we desperately afraid to do what we really want?
COLADY will tell you how to stop worrying and start living.
Read also: John Kehoe’s 3 Psychological Techniques to Help You Get Rid of Anxious Thoughts
Why do we feel anxious
Irritation, outbursts of anger, a feeling of devastation and loss – each of us has experienced this, and someone lives in this state all the time.
We work at a job we hate, we start relationships out of fear of being alone, we do many things because “it’s supposed to be.” And at the same time from the pages Instagram “successful success” oozes over us, every second person sells the secret of happiness, advertising screams about what will make our life better.
A person is lost in the flow of information, rapidly moving away from the true self. There comes a feeling that we are looking at life from the outside, and this is just a film with our participation. As a result, we begin to feel bad.
And this is not only a question of health, but also of the quality of life in general. Our connection with the body, with our soul is destroyed. The inner voice with fleeting feelings of sadness or loss always tells us that we are in the wrong place.
This humble feeling of “everything is fine, but … something is wrong” – is it familiar to you?
The worst thing is to effectively live not your life. But what is even harder is to honestly look inside yourself and see this emptiness, not be afraid, not run away, stay in touch with it.
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But, faced with this, we try to brush aside, devalue our emotions, get distracted, switch. We begin to reassure ourselves with the fact that it just seemed to us. Or we run away to shopping, gadgets, TV shows, food and other consumption.
This brings some relief, but only a temporary effect. And then we return to the previous state again. We experience anxiety, stress, do not know where to start and where to get the strength to change.
But in addition to the rolling waves of anxiety, all people on the planet are united by the desire to be happy. That is, to live “with a part”, to collect all parts of the personality into one whole.
The secret is that we are all unique, so there is no universal recipe for happiness. What’s good for one isn’t necessarily good for another. Therefore, in order to feel happiness, you need to go on a beautiful, but sometimes difficult path of knowing yourself.
How to start living your life
The main skill of the 21st century is to learn how to live your life. Feel and know your inner compass: how do I want? How do I feel better? Without ready-made recipes and instructions “how to and not to.”
7 steps to help us get there.
1. Notice and acknowledge the condition
If it seems to you that “something is not right” with your life, then it doesn’t seem to you. When you catch yourself in this sensation, give yourself the opportunity to explore the nature of this manifestation.
How does it feel for you? How exactly do you feel about it? How does it manifest through your body?
2. Form an image of the desired reality
How do you want to feel every day? What do you want to fill your weekends and weekdays with?
This step is necessary in order to set the motion vector. In order not to wander aimlessly across the ocean of life. Your intention is the light of a lantern in pitch darkness.
3. See what is “already so” in your life
And this is not about positive thinking, but about how to feel support inside and outside of yourself, learn to see the value in every day.
What achievements do you have that you are proud of? What do you already like about yourself and your life?
It is through the feeling of inner support that it becomes possible to move towards expansion, towards the life you want.
4. Start listening to your true desires
Start small – what do I want now, in the moment? What do I want to eat for breakfast? Do I really want coffee now, or is it just a habit? Perhaps tea would be better for me now?
5. Stop comparing yourself to others and start comparing yourself only to yourself yesterday
Remember, as unique as your life is, so is your recipe for happiness.
6. Be your own friend, separate the voice of your inner critic
Hear it within yourself and realize that this is not the real me. The Inner Critic is an imbibed collective image within us that constantly criticizes, scolds, devalues, intimidates.
The more love, care, attention to ourselves in us, the more often we look at ourselves as a good friend, as a beloved and dearest person, the quieter the voice of criticism.
7. Give yourself time to change and shape your desired reality.
Have you ever tried to “hurry up” and open a small bud with your fingers? If you do this, there is a high probability that it will wither.
See yourself as a bud. Let yourself be energized and give yourself time to open up gently and naturally. And then it will be the most beautiful process.
What helps you deal with anxiety? Share with us in the comments!
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