Grown men are grown-up children. In fact, only age changes, but behavior practically does not change, rather the toys that men play are changing.
But there are two big differences. It’s one thing when a man remains a child in his soul and childish behavior manifests itself in little things: in the incredible joy of buying a new phone, in demonstrating new things. This rather touches and brings joy. But there is also another side of children’s behavior, these are infantile manifestations in all life situations. It is very problematic to communicate with such people, they are practically not susceptible to the arguments of common sense.
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The reasons for the child’s behavior of men
If a man behaves like a child, you should not ignore it, it is worthwhile to understand it well. But first, let’s look at the evolution of male behavior.
When a boy is very small, he still does not know how to speak, but only knows how to cry, therefore, in most cases, he can achieve what he wants thanks to whining, whims and tears.
When a child has learned to speak, he has a new tool for getting what he needs. This tool is the word. And with a word you can achieve what you want faster than crying. Now the child can say “Give!” and the parents, satisfied that the child has spoken, give him what he asks for. If the child does not receive this, he resorts to the old way – whims and whining.
Then the parents begin to teach the child politeness. And now the child understands that the effective way to get what he wants is to say “please.” And here, if a child wants to get the desired candy in the store, he begins to explain to his mother why he needs it and say please, if this does not work, then the previous working tool will turn on and if it does not work, then the most effective one will turn on – the roar.
Further, growing up, the child acquires more and more new tools. So in kindergarten or school, he can learn to cheat in order to get what he wants. As an adult, he realizes that money is also a good way to get what you want. More and more new instruments appear.
And now, when a man has matured, he uses the most successful tools to get what he wants, and if nothing works out with their help, then everything starts to go downhill.
Signs of Childhood Behavior
The biggest problem in relationships is that a man does not always and not in all correspond to the role of a husband and does not take on the responsibility that this role implies. In such cases, the husband continues to be the same child as before, but two roles fall on the woman at once: the role of the mother for the adult baby and the role of the husband, the head of the family.
What to do in such a difficult situation? Oddly enough, but the best, winning and correct option is to correspond to the role of a woman and a wife and to take off the role of husband and mother of a large child.
How to do it? Your husband is still that child and he has to be reminded of everything so that he can wash his hands and take out the garbage, and he doesn’t forget that and that. You all remind and remind him of everything in the world, and he simply cannot live a day without you. And it will not be able to if you continue to do so. Give him freedom and independence, let him learn to remember what he needs to do, what responsibilities he has. It doesn’t matter if he will forget about something at first, but what in life turns out well the first time? But he does it himself. Praise him from time to time for being great and not forgetting to pay the rent today. You should be support for him, and what man doesn’t like praise?
What if my husband plays on the computer like a child?
Unfortunately, you will not be able to completely wean him from this, and why. From time to time, they are even useful, a man has where to throw out the accumulated negative energy, to be discharged. But you can still try to reduce the time spent playing games. It is possible that for him it would be interesting and to some extent would have a playful nature.
It can be like a joint active vacation, exactly the kind that you both liked, if he does not like volleyball, then going to the game together will be a burden for him. If you want him to help you around the house, create conditions for him to reward for helping, it can be both praise and a promise to cook a delicious dinner for it or bake his favorite poppycakes.
What if the husband scatters everything and / or does not clean up after himself?
You, of course, are tired of collecting all the dirty socks for him around the apartment, it seems very difficult to wean him from this. To begin with, pay attention of the husband to the fact of the existence of a trash can, some do not even know about its existence. And define it as a place to store dirty socks. If that doesn’t work, then arrange regular reminders of where they should still be.
What if the husband behaves like a child?
- If you have children, point out that he is like father, should be an example to them…
- Remember that not being a mom for a man does not mean shifting all responsibility onto him. It is rather a clear regulation of responsibilities in the family, there are things that he does, there are those that you do. There are also very important things that you do together, this is what brings you closer together. Don’t patronize him like mom. And advise, express your opinion, ask his opinion, explain why you want this or that from him.
- To some extent you should be his friend, with whom he can discuss everything, who will not indulge or contradict him in everything, but help him with advice, where necessary and support.
- Ask your husband for help… Of course you are clever and well done and you can do everything by yourself, then why do you need a man? The man will at least be pleased to help you, it will make you feel stronger, do not be afraid to be weak or look weak. Women’s weakness is all her strength.
How do you deal with your man’s childish behavior?
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