When a friend infuriates and annoys – what to do and how to deal with it?
Life is known to be unpredictable. And one day a friend with whom you went through fire, water and, as they say, copper pipes, and with whom, like sisters, shared sorrows and joys for so many years in a row, suddenly begins to annoy and even … enrage.
Where do these emotions come from, how to deal with them, and does irritation indicate that friendship is over?
The content of the article:
- The best friend has become annoying – why?
- Rules of conduct with a girlfriend who enrages
- The end of friendship – or its reanimation?
The best friend has become annoying – why is this happening?
There are many reasons why loved ones irritate us. Man is an emotional creature, and mood swings are quite normal.
It’s another matter when irritation becomes constant, and there is a desire to hang up while talking with a friend, go to the other side of the street when meeting her, or even break off the relationship altogether.
A friend commands and manipulates me – is such a friendship necessary?
What could be the reasons for this phenomenon?
- You no longer share the common interests that bound you so closely.… She now nurses children and cooks borscht for her husband, and you have a busy life, in which “hen-hens” do not fit.
- You have new circles of communication, each has its own.
- You have nothing more to talk about. Everything you can discuss comes down to your shared past, but you both live in the present. You don’t want to hear about another achievement of her little child, and your friend – about how much fun you had at the club on Saturday.
- You both (or one of you) have a family. There are practically no uniting moments left, and it is not possible to maintain relations artificially.
- One of you has a personal tragedythat the other can neither understand nor share.
- Your (or her) friendship requirements have become too high.
- You have outgrown your girlfriend (approx. – intellectually, for example).
- Are you tired of your girlfriend’s selfishness (she speaks only about herself, and she is not interested in your problems).
- Everything is “too good” for you, and it annoys your friend (jealousy has ruined many relationships). Or, on the contrary, your friend has become lucky, and your “karma” catches up with you day after day, as the winner of the competition for losers. What if your best friend is jealous of you?
How to behave with a friend who infuriates – the basic rules to keep calm and peace of mind
Unfortunately, not every female friendship passes the test of time. More often than not, irritation reaches the “boiling point”, after which there is only parting.
But, perhaps, it makes sense not to throw out emotions, but to understand yourself and assess the situation. If a person is still dear to you, you should look for a way to maintain peace of mind.
- Don’t exaggerate the problem. Perhaps you perceive the situation too sharply, you are dramatizing, or you do not see at all what it really is. For example, you suffer from a friend’s “selfishness”, but she’s just having a difficult period in her life, and she has no one but you to pour out her soul.
- Analyze the situation and try to find the true cause of your irritation. Do not rush to throw the blame on your friend, first of all, pay attention to yourself.
- Identify for yourself the moments that annoy you the most when communicating with your friend. This will help you make the right decision about what to do next.
- Try to accept your girlfriend for who she is. With her capriciousness, nervousness and “eternal whining”, with her way of life and character.
- Look for the good in your relationship. Focus on the bright moments of the friendship, not the negative.
- Don’t build up irritation. If you don’t like something, it is better to draw your friend’s attention to it than to wait for this emotional “snowball” to roll over both of you.
- Realize that irritation is not a disease.that you need to heal, but only the reaction – to actions and events (your own and others).
- Remember that a friend is someone who is always there when you need help., who knows how to listen and hear, who is able to endure and does not demand anything in return. But at the same time, don’t let it sit on your neck. A hungry person is usually given a fishing rod, not a fish – this rule in friendship is one of the most important. You don’t have to solve other people’s problems, but you can guide the person towards solving them.
Finally, talk to your friend honestly. Still, this is not a stranger, and she also deserves sincerity in relation to herself.
What to do if your friend annoys more and more – the end of friendship or her reanimation?
If a friend is constantly annoying, and your irritation only intensifies – then, of course, this is a problem. But this is your problem. Not girlfriends.
It is only your feeling that arose as a reaction to words and deeds. This means that it is in your power to change the situation – taking into account the mistakes that you can easily see in your relationship with your friend.
Primarily, try to talk heart to heart… Not to reprimand her how she infuriates you, but to explain that something is wrong in your friendship, and both parties will have to try to return comfort to the relationship.
If you are as important to your friend as she is to you, then the conversation will be fruitful, and the result will surely please you.…
Nothing helps? Take a pause for a month – leave the “air”, do not communicate… Not rude and harsh, but correct – for example, by sending an SMS that you are leaving on business for a month.
If nothing changes even after a pause, then perhaps the issue of maintaining friendship is no longer relevant.
18 principles a real girlfriend should follow
Do not despair. It so happens that the paths of friends diverge.
Have you had similar situations in your life? And how did you get out of them? Share your stories in the comments below!
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