5 factors that affect our self-esteem

What is self-esteem?

This is how we evaluate ourselves in different aspects of our own personality, the so-called – “I-concept”. Beauty, intelligence, behavior, charisma, social status and so on. But what exactly does women’s self-esteem depend on? Psychologist Olga Romaniv answered this question.

What is the difference between women’s self-esteem and men’s

female self-esteem

Women’s self-esteem differs significantly from men’s. A woman is constantly suppressed by society, imposing many standards that must either be met or tolerated by the attitude of others.

A man forms his self-esteem thanks to his parents. For example, the attention of the opposite sex, sports victories, and career advancement have a positive effect on self-esteem. A woman can experience all of the above in her life, but her self-esteem will be much lower than that of a man.

Let’s see what 5 factors influence women’s self-esteem.

We all come from childhood

Self-esteem is formed in most people from childhood; for many, this formation occurs precisely in adolescence.

Each parent puts certain attitudes in the child, they differ significantly in terms of gender. If we look at the usual class of elementary school, we can see striking differences between the students, who at the time of the first year of school do not yet choose their social affiliation, it is “dictated” by their parents.

Some people weave beautiful hairstyles, knit bows, buy pink patent leather shoes. Other girls are dressed much more modestly, with an emphasis on learning and minimizing distractions. At a more adult age, the girl from the second example may begin to experience problems associated with low self-esteem based on external signs.

Influence of a father on his daughter’s self-esteem

Father and daughter

The upbringing of her father plays an important role in the girl’s life. Unfortunately, many men believe that the manifestation of love and affection towards their daughter ends in everyday communication, walks, and so on. But it is very important for girls to hear praise from their father, who would tell his daughter that she is the most beautiful, the most intelligent, the most tender.

Fathers often joke in this way: “Well, did you come from school? You probably picked up two? ” And the daughter, for example, is a good student or even an excellent student. A harmless joke, but this is only at first glance.

As a result, we get a bunch of complexes, unwillingness to move up the career ladder, fear of more global goals – and all this is only because the internal attitude tells her: “I am not worthy.” In early childhood, there is a critical opportunity when you can instill in a girl a sense of self-esteem that does not depend on the size of her breasts or the length of her legs.

Peer attitude

This is an important stage in the life of every person. How our classmates perceive us, how we communicate with them, the first reactions to the attitude of the opposite sex. Of course, if in adolescence a woman is subjected to emotional and, possibly, physical violence from her peers, this will cause not only low self-esteem, but also a number of other, more serious problems that will lead her to a specialist in the future.

Public opinion

Society dictates what a woman should do and when.

  • Too fat – grow thin.
  • Too thin – dial.
  • Too much makeup – erase.
  • You have bruises under your eyes – paint over.
  • Don’t be so stupid.
  • Don’t be smart.


These settings can be listed endlessly. Any attempt to conform to social standards results in low self-esteem.

Moreover, the more a woman tries to “realize herself” and “improve herself”, the lower her self-esteem, although the situation seems to us the opposite at first glance. A confident woman doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone. If she does something for herself, then she does not need constant approval from the outside. Many women suffer, but do their best to prove that they are worth something.


As a rule, we do not know how to love ourselves just like that. We love ourselves for something. If we have not achieved anything significant in life, our self-esteem is at zero. Have you ever wondered if this is why we have not achieved anything in life that we don’t love ourselves.

After all, if you love yourself, it means to please yourself. Doing things that are fun. There is what you want. Rest where the soul asks.

A happy, self-loving person is full of energy to do what he loves. And a favorite work a priori brings success and realizes us.

If you start from this, then first you need to love yourself, increase your self-esteem, and then engage in your own realization.


The widespread belief in women’s low self-esteem and misconceptions about ourselves creates for all of us. To women, a prophetic but false attitude. When things go wrong with us: problems in our personal life or at work – we come to the conclusion that this is because we have something wrong with our self-esteem and personality. Stop dripping in yourself – start loving yourself and everything will be fine!

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