The warm tender words of a beloved woman can not only warm a man, but also inspire him to take new heights. But the word is the greatest tool not only in building relationships, but also in destruction. Moreover, sometimes one phrase is capable of “blowing up” even those relationships that have lasted for more than one decade. What is absolutely forbidden to tell a man? Psychologists and sexologists talk.
See also: How to learn to understand the chosen one and conduct a dialogue with him correctly?
Phrases that cannot be said to a man
- “It’s your fault!”.
Whatever happens in the family, accusations are the worst reaction. The search for the culprits will not end well anyway. And given that a relationship is always “two”, both are guilty. Therefore, when a difficult situation arises, the first step is not to look for the culprit, but the very solution to the problem.
- “Maybe you’ve had enough, dear?”
Under no circumstances should you grab a man by the sleeve if you are sitting in any company at the table. The result will be the same – a quarrel. You can hint to your beloved man that he has already reached his “golden mean” in alcohol, but only in a private setting.
- “Well, I told you!”
A wise woman will never reproach a man for his mistakes and defeats, from which no one is immune. Moreover, he himself is wounded by the understanding of this fact – that his wife was right. Be your man’s support, not a squealing saw.
- “How annoying it is when he does that!”
Such a publicly spoken phrase will never benefit the relationship. Moreover, in this situation, you belittle not only your beloved man, but also yourself in the eyes of strangers. A public expression of displeasure with your other half speaks of disrespect for him and yourself. What kind of love can we talk about here at all?
- “You always have everything through …”.
This phrase is humiliation for a man. With it, you not only will not inspire your beloved for another feat around the house (repair, etc.), but also completely discourage him from doing something for you. A man should feel like a hero, not a muddler who cannot even be trusted with a screwdriver.
- The bed is a special “territory”. As for sex and intimate relationships, there is a very thin line that cannot be crossed. Never say phrases to a man in bed like – “Come on quickly”, “You are a thousand times better than my ex” (comparison with another, especially in bed, is fatal for a man), “Well, when you’re finished”, “Let’s talk first”, etc. You should also not call his genital organ “cute tap”, “kukusik” and others that belittle his dignity words.
- “What are you thinking about?”.
Most annoying question for a man. He is able to infuriate even the calmest representative of the stronger sex. There are many theories on this topic, therefore, in order not to wake the beast in your soul mate, just delete this phrase from your memory.
- “But my ex-husband …”.
The same as in the “bed” question: in any situation, do not compare your soul mate with ex-men. Apart from anger and jealousy, this phrase will not cause anything.
- “Choose! Or me or football! “
The last part of the phrase can change, in accordance with the hobbies of a man – fishing, car, etc. According to statistics, most partings occur after this phrase. And not because fishing or football is dearer to a man than you, but because he is a man. That is, he will not tolerate conditions being set for him. Therefore, leave ultimatums to yourself, and there are many ways to switch male attention from his hobby to yourself.
- “Nothing happened!”.
How often do we women repeat this phrase when a man for the tenth time in a row asks – “Well, what happened, dear?” Forget this phrase or do not be offended later that your man has become a “callous and insensitive blockhead.”
- “And mom says …”.
All of us adults understand that mom is a wiser person. That her opinion is more balanced and correct. But there is absolutely no need to repeat this to a man every day. If you don’t have your own opinion, at least don’t say out loud that “Mom said so”.
- “Isn’t it time for you to go on a diet?”
If you think that a man is not offended when his beloved woman pokes his own shortcomings in the nose, you are deeply mistaken. A man may not show that he is offended. But your opinion expressed aloud about his too big belly, age and other “defects” will sit in his head for a long time. Therefore, even loving and jokingly, such phrases should not be said – this is a blow to male pride. You risk the fact that a man can find another, wiser woman who will accept him with any flaws.
- “We need to talk”.
Whatever you say after this phrase, the man is already ready in advance to accept everything with hostility. Because after it, as a rule, a showdown follows.
- “Why don’t you look at me like that?”
How often do women ask this question to their husbands who have turned to look at another beauty … And the point is hysterics? Well looked, so what? He didn’t read the phone number in her eyes. A man always looks at other women – this is natural for his masculine nature. Another thing is whether he looks at you the same way? And this is already in your hands. Be always interesting, beautiful and mysterious for your man – and then he will always look at you with adoration.
- “Does this dress suit me?”
There is no need to ask a man this question. Whatever he answers you, you will remain dissatisfied (in most cases). And for a man it doesn’t matter how much this dress suits you, because the general impression is more important for him, and because you are already late for the cinema (theater, to friends, etc.). In addition, for a man in love, a woman is good in any outfit.
- “Well, why do I need this nonsense?” Even if his gift is not very useful to you, you should not talk about it directly. Otherwise, you will discourage him from wanting to give you anything at all.
One last thing to remember:
- Avoid talking about your past and his past (this is superfluous information in a relationship between two).
- Don’t torture a man with stories about your grandmother’s cute little cousin (he’s not interested in that).
- Do not pour out your soul about pain during menstruation, problems with relatives, colleagues and girlfriends.
- Don’t criticize his parents or praise his male friends.
- And don’t tell him how many fans (fans) you have at work.
What you can’t say to a man in bed – says psychologist, sexologist Valentina Snegovaya
In fact, there should be no taboo topics in a couple in a healthy relationship. There is a difference in the form of presentation, the relevance and timeliness of what is said. One of the reasons for emotional discord in the family is suppression and hidden grievances, as well as the inability to express their thoughts in a non-traumatic way for the spouse.
Intimate life is that part of life where it is impossible to lie, a person is forced to be himself. High-quality sex presupposes trust in a partner, the ability to psychologically relax and enjoy the process, and good functioning of most men is associated with a partner’s attitude to him and to intimacy in general.
To begin with, the killer phrases of his attraction and self-esteem: “Are you there soon?“And” Okay, come on … “. As a result, the man realizes that he is not only not wanted, but that his partner does not feel anything good, that is, he tried in vain.
Negative emotions and phrases about his actions and postures: “Well, that’s enough already!”, “I don’t want that,” “I’m tired,”…
If you find his effects unpleasant, then you can teach your man to please you personally. Just tell him how you would like him to behave with you.
You cannot remind your partner of his sexual failures, laugh at the “misfire” that has happened. After all, he is alive and does not have to function like a robot. In addition, sometimes a man is overly worried before a date so much that later he can’t … But this was because of the importance of meeting you, but not because he didn’t want to!
The truth about size and potency is not important! A man is fully identified with his penis, humiliate a penis-gain enemy in a man’s face, first destroying his self-esteem and / or potency.
Laughter is categorically inappropriate during intercourse. Talking about everything except the act itself is inappropriate.
Upon completion of the process, not all men want to categorically sleep, some do not mind talking, but they do not know at all about what and the less you know, the more mysterious for him the list of safe topics. So just tell him what you liked and what you loved.
No stories about past sexual partners, their talents in sex and their own quantitative feats on the bed front.
When the need is ripe to talk about your sex life and you want a change, it is better to do it in a calm state in a confidential atmosphere, without haste, using self-messages. If you yourself do not cope or do not understand the cause of sexual disharmony, you cannot find a way out of an unsettling situation, you can always, as confidentially as possible, personally or together, apply for a face-to-face or online consultation. Remember: family happiness and personal mental health are more expensive and more valuable than the cost of an hour of work of a psychologist.
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