Why my male colleague avoids me at work – every possible reason
Teamwork is always associated with a lot of force majeure, incidents and omissions. Especially if the team is mixed – of men and women. It is not uncommon for a woman to get a job and the whole team suddenly starts to ignore her. This is called bullying, and there may be no reason at all – it didn’t come to court, and that’s all.
But what if a male colleague shuns you? What could be the reason for this attitude?
- He’s in love with you
Under the guise of demonstrative indifference (sometimes in addition to it – nagging, dismissive tone, ridicule), they often hide just love and fear of rejection.
In this case, everything depends on the woman herself – whether she needs this “office romance”, or is it better to keep her prudence. In the first case, it is enough to make it clear to your colleague that you also like him. In the second, to continue working as if nothing was happening.
Sooner or later, he will realize that nothing will shine for him, and the relationship will return to normal working course.
- He is offended at you
Remember and analyze – did you inadvertently hurt the person. If there was such a fact, then the ideal option is to sincerely apologize and offer peace.
- He considers it beneath his dignity to communicate with you
There are also such characters. Any newcomer for them is dust under their feet, and they are practically gods, because they have been working here since the time of Tsar Pea.
Look at such people with a smile. They cannot be taken seriously.
- You were too obsessive in your desire to please him.
That is, they provoked the situation themselves. Here you will have to think hard about your behavior in the team so that the rest of it does not turn away from you.
Reputation is a delicate matter: you lose instantly, but it is impossible to restore.
- He just has a personal dislike for you.
It happens. You are not a bank account for everyone to like. Never mind, don’t get hung up on his attitude.
You should not ignore the answer (you do not want to stoop to his level), but the formal “good morning” and “goodbye” will be enough.
Interrogating him “what’s wrong ?!” and trying to please is also not worth it – you will only fall even more in his eyes. Stay on top.
- Afraid that you will have to help with work again
Perhaps you were too annoying with your requests. Many women, using their charm, ask their male colleagues to help them in their work.
When they really don’t understand something (new job), just for communication (without any ulterior motive) or out of a desire to flirt. Sooner or later, even the most patient colleague will get tired of requests.
And if he is also a married man, devoted to his family, then the only right decision for him will be – simply not to notice you (you never know – what’s on your mind).
- Wants to “sit up”
That is, to press you into your position. It happens that a new person comes to the very place that someone from the old team has looked after for himself.
In this case, resentment against a competitor will prevail, even if you are a positive person on all sides.
Try to win him over – just subtly. Time in this situation is the best “doctor”.
If all else fails, humble yourself and teach yourself not to pay attention.
- He does not perceive you as an employee who is able to carry out the work undertaken.
So men, ironically arching their eyebrows, silently look at women car mechanics or female colleagues in other “male” professions.
Prove to him (and to yourself) that you can handle the job easily. To win the trust of men in the men’s team at the level of “your boyfriend” is difficult, but real.
- It’s annoying about your status
In the mind of a man, a woman is a beautiful being who is not allowed to be higher than him in rank, rank, status, etc. Even if this woman is a boss, he will still consider her weaker and unworthy of a high post.
In a situation where a woman is “from above”, and her status obliges a man to obey, an invisible “conflict of templates” occurs. That is, a man feels slighted (especially if your salary is also higher than his).
In this case, if everything is limited only by the fact that he ignores you, smile and do your job – this is not a disaster.
Worse, when a man begins to express his resentment at the “injustice” invented gossip or hooking.
- You are too suspicious
In fact, nobody ignores you. They just don’t get the attention you want. By the way, this is what happens most often.
It is not worth asking a colleague if this is so. At best, you will be laughed at. And even if it is kind – still not pleasant enough. So just wait.
If it didn’t seem to you, and he really defiantly bypasses you, look for the reason and act according to the situation.
And most importantly, don’t give in to your emotions. A cool head when solving any problem is a must.
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