Violence, trauma, parental rudeness and complete loneliness are the most common words in conversation with psychologists. Already grown up, having experienced fear and horror, someone’s children and grandchildren share their experience for the edification of those families who are just getting together or have already given birth to a child.
And let every mom, dad, grandmother, grandfather and all other relatives know what can and cannot be told to the child. These 10 books on child psychology will detail the work of a child’s “processor”, whether he is a silent infant or an aggressive teenager.
1. Series “To Children About It”, ed. Bombora
A real bestseller among parents who are shy about any kind of sexual education. Books will help to overcome the barrier in a conversation with your child, when you are hesitant to talk about a stork on the roof, and your seemingly just “arrived” baby is already walking with might and main with boys, girls and other people you do not understand.
It is important from a neutral point of view to explain to the child how carefully new acquaintances need to be checked, to be honest with parents and not to be afraid to talk about what he is afraid or shy about. And perhaps, having found in the house a book from the series “For Children About It”, the son or daughter will not take with them the secret about rape by a close relative or about harassment by a physical education teacher.
Talk to your child about the following topics:
- abusive relationships;
- first sexual intercourse;
- physical violence;
- transitional age;
- strange, unusual thoughts,
and you will be sure that your child is honest, open, healthy and happy with you.
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2. “Where do children come from? An easy way to tell your child who we are, how we are different and how we are born“, Kashchenko E., ed. Eksmo
Sexuality education is important to all of us. This is the prevention of unwanted pregnancies, the prevention of STDs, awareness in the choice of the first and subsequent sexual partners. But how to communicate such adult information to your first grader, who sincerely does not understand what is in the mother’s tummy and how a brother or sister will appear from there?
Trust this conversation to professionals: pediatricians and sex psychologists. They will pick up the necessary words for you, and you just have to convey them to your child by handing him a book or gathering with the whole family for Friday dinner.
It would be foolish to bypass this topic until the “right moment”, because this very moment will come when you are at work and the child is with friends. Or it will never come for you at all. And let your children be better filled with medical information than gossip and rumors from chatty friends and girlfriends.
3. “Friendly. Helping Children Find Friends and Avoid Bullying, Dunsmuir S., Dewey J., Birch S., ed. Mann, Ivanov and Ferber
Speaking of friendship. How many examples do you know of how a seemingly pleasant boy got into the company of older, aggressive children and changed beyond recognition? He began to be rude, arguing, hysteria and wrangling.
It is possible that he did not see an example of real friendship in front of him, and his parents only refused all questions and changed the topic. So help your little adult to find faithful companions in life and not succumb to the words of young aggressors! Educational psychologists will give you and your child the most needed advice on:
- emotional breakdowns.
In addition, this book is based on real events and contains vivid examples-illustrations from the life of ordinary children, their friendship and the contribution of their parents.
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4. “Children’s drawing. Why, When and How Children Are Creative: A Guide for Parents and Educators ”, M. Goodman, ed. Hell Marginem Press
The first impulses to creativity were laid in early childhood: the kid picks up a pencil, the first surface that comes under his hand, and paints everything he sees: mom, dad, cat, dog, cartoons and so on. He tries to portray himself as only he sees or draws his most beautiful mother.
But in the process of growing up, along with baby teeth, children’s spontaneity also disappears: the world around becomes more aggressive, gloomy, there are more and more questions, but only fewer answers from parents. And now a teenager, accustomed to keeping everything to himself, pours out on a sheet of paper, laying out his problems and experiences to him.
The first relationship, beatings, bullying – every episode in the life of a child can be captured on a piece of paper, so much so that scarlet roses seem to you, when in fact these are cuts on the hands. There is no need to forbid to create, let the children realize themselves, your task will be to understand what a kindergartner or already a schoolboy wants to tell you. The more he learns the world, the more he wants to tell, explain and discuss, and sometimes one piece of paper will become a person’s only friend, helper and advisor.
Discuss his work with the child, but in no case criticize those plots that are not clear to you, otherwise you will achieve only the opposite effect. The book will teach you to distinguish between the state of emotions and the psyche of a child, based on his still lifes in gouache.
5. “What children are silent about when their parents talk”, E. Kalinina, ed. Publishing solutions
Have you ever noticed that your child is silent, does not tell a lot and prefers only to listen? Have you asked him the motives for this behavior? Now is the time to open this book and learn about all the thoughts that oppress children while parents chat about work and school meeting.
Each family should have a tradition to gather and discuss pressing issues at a common table. This will allow the child to feel heard, he will stop holding thoughts eating up consciousness and will receive all the answers to the questions he needs. Having opened this book, you will understand what right now may bother your child and what needs to be discussed with him, and the author will direct you to a correct dialogue built on trust and sincerity.
6. “Why isn’t anyone playing with me? How to help a child of all ages make friends and socialize successfully, ”K. Maguire, T. Barker, ed. Potpourri
A person is a social being that must constantly be in society. If for some reason the environment leaves him, then the person becomes lonely, scared, the behavior will be more aggressive and impulsive.
That is why it is necessary to help the child to socialize in society as early as possible and to establish himself from any position. In the digital 21st century, it is quite difficult to find a real and living friend: schoolchildren correspond on social networks, teenagers are busy in games, and preschoolers sit watching cartoons.
The parent should show by example how to properly communicate with other people and keep in touch with their friends. But if you’re having trouble with that, check out this simple guide!
7. “What is he thinking about? The adolescent brain: a time of unique opportunities ”, E. Krone, ed. Kick scooter
Adolescence is one of the most difficult crises in a child’s life for his parents. When riots begin, the parental word is not put into anything and a completely different life begins – it is important to accept this stage of growing up, remember yourself in these years and help the teenager cope with new emotions.
This bestselling book by a Dutch scientist will help you and your child overcome gadget addiction and identify the benefits of social media.
8. “Syndrome of the first grader, or Psychosomatics and school stress”, I. Gorbunova, ed. Phoenix
How can you help your child adapt to new conditions? Indeed, after the ruler, white bows, flower bouquets and ties, endless dictations, calculations and sedentary work for almost half of the day await him. But it’s hard to relax at home either: you need to do your homework, learn new material, help mom and dad, and even get some sleep.
Such a sharp transition from one regime to another causes protest in many children: here there are illnesses, and stresses, and injuries. Help your child by developing a reward and punishment plan for the day. Provide motivation to further your studies with this book!
9. “I believe you are in pain! Adolescents in borderline states “, A. Leontyeva, ed. Nicaea
Another book that studies the psycho-emotional state of a teenager from a deeper point of view. Depression is, unfortunately, a fairly common diagnosis among boys and girls from 12 to 17 years old. And after growing up, it only intensifies, or the person gives up and finally gives up.
Using the examples of hotline specialists, psychiatrists and the author of this book, a lifelong story is created: about a long road to recovery. Help your child understand himself and go through such a difficult life stage.
10. “Raising children with autism. 90 Exercises for Involving Your Child in Communication, Interaction and Play, ”K. Cook, ed. Dialectics
A child with an autism spectrum is primarily your child, and this diagnosis cannot be eliminated. The author offers exercises for the whole family that will help the special person to integrate into the society of other children and accept themselves as they are. It is important for him to learn how to regulate his emotions, and the final result will help the child for the rest of his life. Do not despair if you have heard the diagnosis, strive to help your new happiness, and not throw it into the unknown.
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