Depression in a man – what is the reason for her husband’s bad mood and how to help?
Men, as you know, don’t cry. But they get depressed. Moreover, this condition is aggravated in proportion to social stereotypes and from year to year it becomes an increasingly serious problem. Relations with a woman during such a period are very difficult for a man, the concentration of a strong half on his problems does not help family happiness at all. If you are familiar with this problem firsthand, then it’s time to act.
The content of the article:
The main causes of depression in men – looking for the root of a bad mood in a husband
It is generally accepted that depression is characteristic mainly of women. But recently, it is the male part of the population that has been faced with this condition. What is the reason? The most common:
- Got fired.
- Work is not fun.
- Relationships with superiors (colleagues) do not add up.
- Earnings do not match requests.
- Personal life is full of failures.
- The work is overly stressful and physically (psychologically) exhausting.
- Psychological trauma.
- Unfulfilled dreams.
- Changing of the living place.
- Loss of a loved one.
- Military service.
- Spouse’s pregnancy.
- Work at night.
- Work is risky.
- Forced business trips.
These are the most basic reasons. What can we say about those cases for which a reason is not needed … With a disturbed psychological balance, any little thing can provoke a severe and prolonged depression. It is also worth noting the hereditary factor. There is a type of people for whom the most harmonious state is a state of continuous stress. A person accustomed to such a state is no longer able to enjoy life, in which a period of calm, tranquility and prosperity begins. The habit of being “taut” leads to depression and nervous breakdowns.
Signs and symptoms of depression in men – when does he need your help?
Male depression is caused by social / emotional factors, age periods, and responsibilities assigned to a man. The level of male responsibility is always higher than female responsibility, and in this situation, personality crises provoke more serious conditions than in the weak half of humanity. How to tell if your man is depressed? We study the signs:
- Aggressiveness and irritability.
- Self-doubt, low self-esteem.
- Attacks of rage.
- Abrupt mood swings.
- High blood pressure.
- Disturbed sleep / appetite.
- Decreased libido.
- Physical ailments – from headache to chest pain.
- Increased workaholism, or vice versa – unwillingness to do anything, complete apathy.
- Leaving for extreme sports, gambling.
- Passion for alcohol.
- Feeling of constant weariness.
- Slow speech, movement.
- Changes in weight.
- Increased anxiety.
How to get a man out of depression – advice from psychologists to wise wives
Of course, it is not enough joy to watch your beloved man in such a state. Is there anything you can do for him? How to help get out of depression?
- The most important thing is to let him know that you are there, no matter what. That you will support him in any situation. That any problem is temporary. Trust is the key to your relationship.
- Talk to your husband “frankly.” He must open up and talk about the reason for his condition. And your concern is to convey that there is nothing shameful or dangerous in this. Any problem can be solved. There is a way out of any situation.
- Find out the cause of your depression? Work with your spouse to find ways to fix the situation. If it is impossible to correct the situation, change your attitude towards it. Together. To do this, sometimes you need to slightly or, on the contrary, significantly shake up your life. Up to a long long trip, change of residence or place of work.
- Use relaxing treatments – bath with aromatic oils, massage. Do not be rowdy and do not be indignant that “the bucket is full again.” Now the spouse needs support, affection and understanding, not hairpins and quarrels.
- Help your husband to believe in himself. Become his reliable support, support his ideas, even if they seem absurd to you. As practice shows, the most absurd ideas often become a springboard to a new happy life.
- Change your diet. Add in it more foods that contribute to the production of serotonin (approx. – the hormone of joy). For example, citruses and nuts, salmon, chocolate, rosehip broth, bananas.
- Change the environment often. Walk your spouse where he can forget about his problems: cinemas or picnics in nature, fishing, visiting friends, etc. Or you can even just take tickets to “where is enough” and rush towards adventure (many do this, how depression cuts to its roots, and it seems that there is no way out).
- Look for the pros in the situation that has arisen. Always look for pluses in everything, but do not notice the minuses or overcome them. Get in the habit of looking at the world through the eyes of an optimist.
- Do not blame your spouse for all sins. There is no need to humiliate him by the fact that he is a “loser”, that “his hands are not from the right place …” and others. Phrases like “well, I told you so!”, “I turned out to be right, as always,” etc. Instead of them, use – “We will survive!”
- Don’t let the man close. The more destructive the depression will be, the more the man becomes withdrawn into himself. Shake it just enough so that it does not have time to hide in a shell. Create conditions in which he himself wants to open up to you.
- If your spouse is irritable and not restrained in communication, do not rush to snap back. Be calm and calm, like the atomic icebreaker “Lenin”. Your task is to maintain balance in the family.
- Praising and admiring your spouse, do not overdo it. The ostentatious praise is even more annoying. Be sincere.
- In this state, a man is inclined to make decisions under the influence of emotions, which he may later regret. Do not rush to condemn him, shout, be indignant. Just convince him that all serious decisions should be postponed for a while.
- Take a vacation. Spit on everything and buy tickets to where your spouse will be good and calm. Maybe you haven’t visited his parents for a long time? Or maybe he always dreamed of fishing on Lake Baikal? Forget about everything and go. The husband’s condition is more important than those things that you can never change anyway.
- If your spouse has the talent of a writer or at least an author, invite him to put all his problems on paper. Or just start writing a book, a collection of poems or memoirs. Any person who writes to you will confirm the “curative” possibilities of “scrapping”. And to make it even more interesting, you can upload your stories on one of the literary sites. For many, getting feedback on their works and communication with other authors becomes an outlet and a way out of the state of depression.
And the most important thing. Don’t expect miracles. They may or may not happen. Wonder yourself! And live today. Then all the problems will seem empty and far-fetched to you.
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