How the close bond between mother and son affects his life
The amazing bond between a mother and her children cannot be ignored. A close relationship with the mother helps to fully develop the personality of the child. But the connection between mother and son deserves special attention.
Indeed, the mother-son relationship has a huge impact on his personality and life in general. Boys who are close to their mother grow up to be stable and happy people. Why is it so important? let’s consider 10 incredible facts about the invisible connection between mother and son and its impact on the life and development of the child.
1. Good school performance
Sons of loving mothers do well in school. It has been proven that sons who have a strong bond with their mother develop a great sense of responsibility. They are usually good at what they are doing and have a higher success rate. In addition, many studies have been conducted in which it has been concluded that if the child inherits his intelligence from the mother, then their connection is deeper.
“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.”
2. Lower likelihood of reckless behavior
Another study shows that close relationships with mom significantly reduce the risk of boys engaging in high-risk behaviors. It is from the mother that the son learns that it is wise to be careful. He will think through his actions and learn responsibility from a very early age. A loving mother’s son will grow up to be more responsible and mature.
“None of our advice will teach children to stand and walk until the time is right, but we will try to help them.” (Julie Lytcott-Haymes, “Let Them Go”)
3. Feeling confident
We all need support as we stand at a crossroads. It is especially difficult to do without a loved one. That is why the help of family and friends is so important to us. But the support of the mother is especially important: it helps the son to grow and develop, gives a feeling of confidence. Believing in a child, as well as supporting him – this is the secret of true motherly love!
“We can help your child learn good behavior, courtesy and compassion by example, support and unconditional love.”(Tim Seldin, The Encyclopedia of Montessori)
4. Better communication skills
One study found that the communication skills of children who spend a lot of time with their mothers are 20-40% better. The reason for this is because cognitive development is faster when you do collaborative activities. The boy will improve his social skills through communication with his mother. Compared to men, women tend to express themselves better and understand interpersonal communication with others. They are good role models when it comes to communication skills. When a son has a close bond with his mother, she will definitely pass on these traits to him.
“Only in a team can a child’s personality develop most fully and comprehensively.”(Nadezhda Konstantinovna Krupskaya)
5. Less prejudice
There are dozens of prejudices and stereotypes in the world. Some of them are so subtle that people do not even realize that these are prejudices. For example, we often tell a boy, “Men don’t cry.” Children, in principle, are more emotional than adults: while they cannot speak, they need to be able to express their emotions in order to be better understood. Therefore, young children should not be taught to suppress their feelings. Experts say that from an early age, boys need to learn to experience the full range of emotions, from joy to sadness. Therefore, you should not instill in boys that crying means showing weakness. It is important for boys to be able to express their feelings. By depriving her son of the opportunity to cry, the mother prevents him from becoming an emotionally mature person.
“Emotions have arisen in the process of evolution as a means by which living beings establish the significance of certain conditions for satisfying their needs. Emotions are instincts of a higher order. “(Charles Darwin)
6. High emotional intelligence
The son of a mother who is emotionally intelligent usually borrows these abilities from her. He observes how she reacts to others and learns how to feel and understand others. For many years he learns to act like her, and develops his own emotional intelligence.
“Only a living example brings up a child, and not words, even the best ones, but not backed up by deeds.”(Anton Semyonovich Makarenko)
7. A painless transition into adulthood
This is how you build a family nest so that the chicks are comfortable and joyful, and at one point they fly out of a warm place into adulthood. This period in the life of the parents is called the empty nest syndrome. Growing up can be an ordeal. Many children are afraid to leave the parent’s nest and strive for independence. Studies have shown that children living in a supported family feel much more confident when they fly out of the nest because they know that their parents will always be there for them and will support them in any situation. Despite the fact that it will be difficult for mom to accept the fact that her boy has already become a grown man, she must be sure that everything will be all right with him, and all thanks to her! A close bond with her son will help her survive this event!
“Leave the kids alone, but be within reach in case you need it.”(Astrid Lindgren)
8. Respect for women
In principle, it is impossible to imagine that a man who loves and cares for his mother will treat other women badly. Being next to his mother, the boy learns to communicate with women and learns about their psyche. The sooner you start instilling in your son an understanding of how to respect women, the better. From the earliest years in a boy, respect for women must be brought up. Indeed, one of the most basic characteristics of the ideal image of a man is his ability to behave with the female sex.
“Men who love their mothers treat women well. And they have tremendous respect for women. “(Elena Barkin)
9.Reduces the risk of mental health problems
The attachment of mother and son has also been shown to significantly improve a boy’s mental health. He learns to cope with problems and receives enough support to avoid depression and anxiety.
“Children who are treated with respect and support are more emotionally resilient than those who are constantly protected.” (Tim Seldin)
10. Higher likelihood of success
If we combine successful schooling, self-confidence, mental toughness and sociability, we have the perfect recipe. the winner in life. This is not only about financial success, we are talking about the main thing – happiness. Any mother wants to see her boy happy, and her participation in his life cannot be overemphasized.
“I continue to believe that if children are provided with the tools they need to succeed, they will succeed even beyond their wildest dreams.” (David Witter)
Raising a son is not easy, especially when this is the first child and the parents lack knowledge and experience. But the main postulates a hundred years ago and now remain love for the child, respect for his personality and education by his own example. Then your son will grow from a boy into a real man, whom you can rightfully be proud of!
In the life of every child, there are significant adults – usually mom and dad. Finding closeness with a significant adult, according to John Bowlby’s attachment theory, is the basic goal of a child’s behavior system.
Parents’ challenge: to provide a safe supportive environment that creates the preconditions for the constructive development of the child. The better the living conditions of the child, the easier it is for him to develop. And the more maternal support he feels, the easier it is for him to seek help and learn new things without fear of failure, because if necessary, adults will help, and with their help the child will do what he did not succeed. Remember Vygotsky’s area of actual and immediate development. A mother who is in contact, in a close relationship with a child, always looks more confident and reliable than a cold, rejecting mother.
Mary Ainsward also developed a classification of attachments, among which we can distinguish a reliable type of attachment between a child and a significant adult, when the adult satisfies the child’s needs and supports him in development.
The main thing is not to forget about the fine line between supporting a child and his infantilization. It is important that the child can rely on adults and do something on his own, and the mother’s task is to support this independence, using intimacy as a resource and nourishment for the child in the formation of personality.
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