How to raise a man from a boy: important advice from a psychologist

Probably, all parents of boys are worried about the question: “how to make the son grow up as a real man?”

My son is also growing up, and, naturally, I also want him to become a worthy man when he grows up.

  • But what is needed for this?
  • And what absolutely must not be done?
  • How does mom and dad affect the boy?
  • How to instill the necessary character traits?

Let’s try to sort out all these issues.


Mother and son

6 basic rules for raising a boy

  1. The most important thing is the right example next to… Ideally, a father. But if for some reason he is not around, then let this example be grandfather, uncle. But such an example should be for the boy to form a certain image of a man, to which he will strive.
  2. Mother’s love and care… It is imperative for the boy to receive hugs, kisses, and care from his mother. It is the mother who helps the boy develop such qualities as helping a woman and the ability to protect. It depends on the mother how the son will perceive women in the future. You will definitely not spoil him with a manifestation of love and tenderness.
  3. Praise and support… This is an integral part of raising a son. Praise and support will help the boy become more self-confident. Plus, it will inspire the boys to achieve.

“My son was a little insecure. With any difficulty, he almost always gave up. By the age of 10, because of this, he became quite withdrawn and generally stopped taking on something new. A psychologist at school advised me to support my son and praise even for something insignificant. It worked! Soon, the son eagerly took on something new and stopped worrying if something did not work out, knowing that we would support him in any case. “

  1. Raising responsibility This is a very important character trait for a man. Teach your son to be responsible for his actions. Explain that every action has consequences. And also, you need to accustom yourself to the fact that you need to clean up the table, clean up your things and toys.
  2. Learn to Express Your Feelings… It is accepted in society that a man should be very restrained, as a result, they cannot explain their feelings and emotions at all.
  3. Encourage self-reliance… Even if the boy does not succeed, even if he does everything very slowly so far. Let such, as it seems to us, small achievements be his pride.

The wife of a famous football player Maria Pogrebnyak, brings up three sons and believes that independence is very important:

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“In our family, we help with lessons if the children are already completely at a dead end! A big mistake of parents is to limit the independence of children, to do and decide everything for them, not realizing that it will be very difficult for children to adapt to real life later! “

5 important nots to consider when raising a boy

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  1. Do not take away the choice. Let the boy always have a choice, even in small things: “Do you have porridge or scrambled eggs for breakfast?”, “Choose which T-shirt you wear.” If he learns to make a choice, he will be able to take responsibility for that choice. This will make it easier for him to make more serious decisions in the future.
  2. Do not obstruct the expression of emotions.… Do not tell your son: “Why are you crying like a girl”, “Be a man”, “Boys don’t play this” and similar expressions. These phrases will only help the child to withdraw into himself and cause thoughts that something is wrong with him.
  3. Do not suppress his desires and aspirations.… Let him build a plane from twigs or dream of becoming a cook.

“My parents always wanted me to own a large company, become a coach or a professional athlete, or at least a car mechanic. In general, they wanted a “male” job for me. And I became a flight attendant. My parents did not immediately accept my choice, but over time they got used to it. Although this profession is still perceived as a female one. “

  1. Don’t violate personal boundaries. A boy cannot grow up to be a worthy man if he does not have his own space, his choice and his decisions. By respecting his boundaries, you can teach him to respect yours and other people’s boundaries.
  2. Don’t overdo it with the desire to raise a real man.… Many parents are so worried that their son will not live up to the ideal of a man that they ruin the child’s entire personality.

Raising a child is hard work. Regardless of whether you have a boy or a girl, the main and important thing that you can give a child is love, care, understanding and support. As Oscar Wilde said The best way to raise good children is to make them happy. “

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